{"id":4311,"date":"2021-04-24T21:00:17","date_gmt":"2021-04-24T21:00:17","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/mamman.is\/?p=4311"},"modified":"2021-04-30T08:25:44","modified_gmt":"2021-04-30T08:25:44","slug":"foreldrakulnun-er-stadreynd-sem-getur-haft-skadleg-ahrif","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mamman.is\/?p=4311","title":{"rendered":"Foreldrakulnun er sta\u00f0reynd sem getur haft ska\u00f0leg \u00e1hrif"},"content":{"rendered":"

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Yrja Kristinsd\u00f3ttir er 36 \u00e1ra \u00feriggja barna mamma og eigandi fyrirt\u00e6kisins Dafna, sem b\u00fd\u00f0ur upp \u00e1 mark\u00fej\u00e1lfun og r\u00e1\u00f0gj\u00f6f fyrir foreldra og b\u00f6rn. Einnig rekur Yrja Vell\u00ed\u00f0unarsetri\u00f0 sem sta\u00f0sett er \u00ed Urri\u00f0aholti \u00ed Gar\u00f0ab\u00e6. Bla\u00f0akona Mamman.is hitti Yrju yfir kaffibolla \u00ed Vigd\u00edsarh\u00fasi sem var einkar vel vi\u00f0 h\u00e6fi enda Yrja h\u00e6fileikar\u00edk kona og auglj\u00f3s lei\u00f0togi \u00ed s\u00e9r, l\u00edkt og Vigd\u00eds.\u00a0<\/strong>\u00deegar bla\u00f0akona rakst \u00e1 Instagramreikning D\u00f6fnu vakti upp forvitni hver st\u00e6\u00f0i \u00e1 bak vi\u00f0 s\u00ed\u00f0una. \u00dear var miki\u00f0 fjalla\u00f0 um foreldrakulnun og a\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 s\u00e9 e\u00f0lilegt sem foreldri a\u00f0 upplifa allskonar tillfinningar, ekki bara eint\u00f3ma gle\u00f0i.\u00a0<\/span><\/strong>Vi\u00f0 byrju\u00f0um \u00fev\u00ed e\u00f0lilega \u00e1 \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 spyrja, hver er konan \u00e1 bak vi\u00f0 Dafna?\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201e\u00c9g heiti Yrja Kristinsd\u00f3ttir og er eigandi Dafna sem b\u00fd\u00f0ur upp \u00e1 mark\u00fej\u00e1lfun og r\u00e1\u00f0gj\u00f6f og rek einnig Vell\u00ed\u00f0anarsetri\u00f0 sem er sta\u00f0sett \u00ed Urri\u00f0aholti, Gar\u00f0ab\u00e6. Dafna s\u00e9rh\u00e6fir sig \u00ed b\u00f6rnum, unglingum og fullor\u00f0num sem vilja auka vell\u00ed\u00f0an s\u00edna og n\u00e1 betra jafnv\u00e6gi. \u00c9g vinn \u00fat fr\u00e1 a\u00f0fer\u00f0um j\u00e1kv\u00e6\u00f0rar s\u00e1lfr\u00e6\u00f0i og mark\u00fej\u00e1lfunar. \u00dear er l\u00f6g\u00f0 \u00e1hersla \u00e1 \u00fe\u00e6tti \u00e1 bor\u00f0 vi\u00f0 j\u00e1kv\u00e6\u00f0ar tilfinningar, styrkleika og hugarfar sem eiga \u00fe\u00e1tt \u00ed \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 einstaklingurinn bl\u00f3mstrar, vex og dafnar. Auk \u00feessa er \u00e9g a\u00f0 vinna a\u00f0 verkefni \u00e1samt Marit Dav\u00ed\u00f0sd\u00f3ttur, sem ber nafni\u00f0 Gle\u00f0iskruddan<\/i>. Gle\u00f0iskruddan er dagb\u00f3k fyrir b\u00f6rn \u00e1 aldrinum 6-12 \u00e1ra og er tilgangur hennar a\u00f0 auka sj\u00e1lfs\u00feekkingu, tr\u00fa \u00e1 eigin getu, bjarts\u00fdni og vell\u00ed\u00f0an,\u201d segir Yrja og b\u00e6tir vi\u00f0: \u201eGle\u00f0iskruddan er b\u00e6\u00f0i \u00e1 Instagram og \u00e1 Facebook og \u00fear er a\u00f0 finna b\u00e6\u00f0i fr\u00e6\u00f0slu og fr\u00f3\u00f0leik sem n\u00fdtist f\u00f3lki \u00e1 \u00f6llum aldri. Einnig h\u00f6fum vi\u00f0 opna\u00f0 vefs\u00ed\u00f0una Glediskruddan.is en \u00fear m\u00e1 finna uppl\u00fdsingar um dagb\u00f3kina, n\u00e1mskei\u00f0 og fyrirlestra sem eru \u00ed bo\u00f0i,\u201d segir Yrja.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Hefur mikla \u00e1str\u00ed\u00f0u a\u00f0 a\u00f0sto\u00f0a einstaklinga vi\u00f0 a\u00f0 efla vell\u00ed\u00f0an<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201e\u00c9g hef fj\u00f6lbreytilega menntun en \u00fear m\u00e1 nefna: BA. \u00ed f\u00e9lagsr\u00e1\u00f0gj\u00f6f, MA. \u00ed uppeldis-og menntunarfr\u00e6\u00f0i me\u00f0 \u00e1herslu \u00e1 l\u00edfsleikni, sj\u00e1lfsmynd og fars\u00e6ld, dipl\u00f3ma \u00ed dj\u00e1knafr\u00e6\u00f0um, dipl\u00f3ma \u00ed j\u00e1kv\u00e6\u00f0ri s\u00e1lfr\u00e6\u00f0i \u00e1 meistarastigi, d\u00e1lei\u00f0slut\u00e6kni og mark\u00fej\u00e1lfun. \u00c9g er einnig a\u00f0 kl\u00e1ra framhaldsn\u00e1m \u00ed mark\u00fej\u00e1lfun \u00ed ma\u00ed og ver\u00f0 \u00fear a\u00f0 auki votta\u00f0ur NBI \u00fej\u00e1lfi,\u201d segir Yrja. \u201e\u00c9g hef mikla \u00e1str\u00ed\u00f0u fyrir a\u00f0 a\u00f0sto\u00f0a einstaklinga vi\u00f0 a\u00f0 efla andlega heilsu, vell\u00ed\u00f0an og auka hamingju. \u00c9g vinn miki\u00f0 me\u00f0 foreldrum, \u00fe\u00e1 s\u00e9rstaklega m\u00e6\u00f0rum sem eru a\u00f0 koma \u00far f\u00e6\u00f0ingarorlofi og\/e\u00f0a eru a\u00f0 finna jafnv\u00e6gi\u00f0 \u00e1 milli m\u00f3\u00f0urhlutverksins, vinnu og \u00feess a\u00f0 vera \u00fe\u00e6r sj\u00e1lfar. \u00c9g legg mikla \u00e1herslu \u00ed m\u00ednu starfi \u00e1 a\u00f0 \u00fe\u00e6r f\u00e1i a\u00f0sto\u00f0 vi\u00f0 a\u00f0 a\u00f0laga m\u00f3\u00f0urhlutverki\u00f0 a\u00f0 s\u00e9r, \u00ed sta\u00f0 \u00feess a\u00f0 a\u00f0laga sj\u00e1lfa sig a\u00f0 m\u00f3\u00f0urhlutverkinu,\u201d segir Yrja sannf\u00e6randi.\u00a0<\/span>\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

En hva\u00f0 er foreldrakulnun?\u00a0<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201eForeldrahlutverki\u00f0 er margslungi\u00f0, \u00fea\u00f0 er krefjandi, skemmtilegt, erfitt, yndislegt, gefandi og fj\u00f6lbreytilegt. Foreldrar eru or\u00f0nir hreinskilnari og opnari \u00ed umr\u00e6\u00f0unni um upplifun \u00e1 streitu, kv\u00ed\u00f0a og \u00f3jafnv\u00e6gi \u00ed foreldrahlutverkinu. \u00dea\u00f0 er j\u00e1kv\u00e6\u00f0 \u00fer\u00f3un \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 foreldrakulnun (e. parental burnout) er sta\u00f0reynd og er aflei\u00f0ing af langvarandi \u00fereytu og streitu \u00ed krefjandi a\u00f0st\u00e6\u00f0um,\u201d segir Yrja.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

\u201cForeldrakulnun l\u00fdsir s\u00e9r \u00feannig a\u00f0 foreldrahlutverki\u00f0 ver\u00f0ur einstaklingnum b\u00e6\u00f0i l\u00edkamlega og tilfinningalega ofvi\u00f0a og getur valdi\u00f0 efasemdum um getu til a\u00f0 vera gott foreldri og\/ e\u00f0a tilfinningalegri fjarveru.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Einkenni foreldrakulnunar eru me\u00f0al annars: Foreldrar upplifa kv\u00ed\u00f0a og \u00e1hyggjur. Mikil \u00fereyta. Foreldrar eiga erfitt me\u00f0 a\u00f0 vera me\u00f0vita\u00f0 til sta\u00f0ar og nj\u00f3ta \u00feess a\u00f0 eiga t\u00edma me\u00f0 fj\u00f6lskyldunni. Foreldrar geta upplifa\u00f0 efasemdir um a\u00f0 a\u00f0 vera gott foreldri og \u00fev\u00ed fylgir sektarkennd.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Er \u00feetta e\u00f0lilegt \u00e1stand?\u00a0<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201e\u00dea\u00f0 er e\u00f0lilegt a\u00f0 upplifa streitu, \u00fereytu, \u00f3jafnv\u00e6gi og allskonar tilfinningar \u00feegar ma\u00f0ur er foreldri, en a\u00f0 lenda \u00ed kulnun getur haft ska\u00f0leg \u00e1hrif. \u00dea\u00f0 er \u00fev\u00ed mj\u00f6g mikilv\u00e6gt a\u00f0 vera me\u00f0vita\u00f0ur um \u00f6ll \u00feau einkenni sem eru til sta\u00f0ar til a\u00f0 geta leita\u00f0 s\u00e9r a\u00f0sto\u00f0ar \u00e1\u00f0ur en foreldri upplifir foreldrakulnun,\u201d segir Yrja.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Hva\u00f0a h\u00f3pur foreldra er l\u00edklegastur til a\u00f0 upplifa foreldrakulnun?\u00a0<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201eSamkv\u00e6mt ranns\u00f3knum \u00e1 foreldrakulnun eru \u00e1kve\u00f0nir h\u00f3par foreldra \u00ed \u00e1h\u00e6ttuh\u00f3p en \u00fea\u00f0 eru \u00feeir sem a) eiga erfitt me\u00f0 tilfinningastj\u00f3rn og streitu, b) skortir stu\u00f0ning fr\u00e1 maka og\/e\u00f0a hinu foreldri, c) skortir uppeldisf\u00e6rni, d) eiga b\u00f6rn me\u00f0 s\u00e9r\u00fearfir og e) vinna hlutavinnu e\u00f0a eru heimavinnandi.\u201c.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Hvert er h\u00e6gt a\u00f0 leita s\u00e9r eftir a\u00f0sto\u00f0?\u00a0<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201eAllir foreldrar geta upplifa\u00f0 einhver af \u00feessum einkennum og \u00feess m\u00e1 geta a\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 er fullkomlega e\u00f0lilegt a\u00f0 upplifa einhver af \u00feeim \u00e1n \u00feess a\u00f0 lenda \u00ed kulnun. Ef a\u00f0 einkennin ver\u00f0a langvarandi er r\u00e1\u00f0lagt a\u00f0 leita s\u00e9r a\u00f0sto\u00f0ar. \u00dea\u00f0 er \u00e1n efa h\u00e6gt a\u00f0 leita til margv\u00edslegra me\u00f0fer\u00f0ara\u00f0ila sem geta a\u00f0sto\u00f0a\u00f0 foreldra sem eru a\u00f0 upplifa \u00feessi einkenni en mark\u00fej\u00e1lfun \u00ed anda j\u00e1kv\u00e6\u00f0rar s\u00e1lfr\u00e6\u00f0i er ein \u00feeirra lei\u00f0a,\u201d segir Yrja og b\u00e6tir vi\u00f0: \u201eA\u00f0fer\u00f0ir j\u00e1kv\u00e6\u00f0rar s\u00e1lfr\u00e6\u00f0i bj\u00f3\u00f0a upp\u00e1 m\u00f6guleika til a\u00f0 koma \u00e1 jafnv\u00e6gi, draga \u00far \u00e1lagi og auka vell\u00ed\u00f0an \u00e1 \u00feessu svi\u00f0i en me\u00f0al ranns\u00f3knarefna innan greinarinnar eru vell\u00ed\u00f0an, j\u00e1kv\u00e6\u00f0ar tilfinningar, hamingja, \u00ferautseigja, samb\u00f6nd, hugarfar, tilgangur og hva\u00f0 f\u00e6r f\u00f3lk til a\u00f0 vaxa og dafna \u00ed l\u00edfinu. \u00cd j\u00e1kv\u00e6\u00f0ri s\u00e1lfr\u00e6\u00f0i eru rannsaka\u00f0ir \u00feeir \u00fe\u00e6ttir sem hafa j\u00e1kv\u00e6\u00f0 \u00e1hrif \u00e1 einstaklinga og f\u00e1 \u00fe\u00e1 til a\u00f0 bl\u00f3mstra. Ranns\u00f3knir hafa leitt \u00ed lj\u00f3s a\u00f0 j\u00e1kv\u00e6tt vi\u00f0horf er verndandi \u00fe\u00e1ttur fyrir s\u00e1lr\u00e6na og l\u00edkamlega heilsu. \u00dea\u00f0 hafa jafnframt veri\u00f0 rannsaka\u00f0ar a\u00f0fer\u00f0ir og \u00e6fingar sem r\u00e6kta me\u00f0 okkur j\u00e1kv\u00e6\u00f0ar tilfinningar, heg\u00f0un og hugsanir og kallast \u00fe\u00e6r j\u00e1kv\u00e6\u00f0 inngrip,\u201d segir Yrja og b\u00e6tir vi\u00f0 a\u00f0 lokum: \u201eMark\u00fej\u00e1lfun \u00ed anda j\u00e1kv\u00e6\u00f0rar s\u00e1lfr\u00e6\u00f0i er \u00fev\u00ed tilvalin fyrir skipulag, sj\u00e1lfs\u00feekkingu, markmi\u00f0asetningu, auki\u00f0 jafnv\u00e6gi og n\u00e1 a\u00f0 vera \u00ed n\u00fainu og nj\u00f3ta e\u00f0a vera til sta\u00f0ar me\u00f0 vakandi athygli. Semsagt aukin vell\u00ed\u00f0an, jafnv\u00e6gi og hamingja. Eins og oft er tala\u00f0 um \u00fe\u00e1 \u00feurfum vi\u00f0 a\u00f0 setja \u00e1 okkur s\u00farefnisgr\u00edmuna \u00e1\u00f0ur en vi\u00f0 getum a\u00f0sto\u00f0a\u00f0 a\u00f0ra.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Allar n\u00e1nari uppl\u00fdsingar er h\u00e6gt a\u00f0 n\u00e1lgast inn \u00e1 vefs\u00ed\u00f0u dafna.is<\/strong><\/a> einnig er h\u00e6gt a\u00f0 senda Yrju t\u00f6lvup\u00f3st \u00e1 dafna@dafna.is Vi\u00f0 hvetjum alla \u00fe\u00e1 sem tengja vi\u00f0 einkenni kulnunar a\u00f0 leita s\u00e9r a\u00f0sto\u00f0ar.<\/em><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

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