{"id":5586,"date":"2021-06-23T18:51:57","date_gmt":"2021-06-23T18:51:57","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/mamman.is\/?p=5586"},"modified":"2021-06-23T18:52:03","modified_gmt":"2021-06-23T18:52:03","slug":"ad-thoknast-odrum-getur-verid-mikill-streituvaldur","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mamman.is\/?p=5586","title":{"rendered":"A\u00f0 \u00fe\u00f3knast \u00f6\u00f0rum getur veri\u00f0 mikill streituvaldur"},"content":{"rendered":"

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header_4_5_font_size_last_edited=”on|tablet” header_5_5_font_size_last_edited=”on|tablet” header_6_5_font_size_last_edited=”on|tablet”]@ET-DC@eyJkeW5hbWljIjp0cnVlLCJjb250ZW50IjoicG9zdF90aXRsZSIsInNldHRpbmdzIjp7ImJlZm9yZSI6IjxoMT4iLCJhZnRlciI6IjwvaDE+In19@[\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][\/et_pb_section][et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ _builder_version=”4.9.2″ _module_preset=”default” use_background_color_gradient=”on” background_color_gradient_start=”#f7f2ef” background_color_gradient_end=”#e9e3e1″ custom_margin=”||-56px|||”][et_pb_row use_custom_gutter=”on” _builder_version=”4.9.2″ _module_preset=”default” max_width=”1000px” module_alignment=”center”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.9.2″ _module_preset=”default”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”3.27.4″ background_size=”initial” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat” admin_label=”Tedddddddxt”]S\u00e1 sem vill gera \u00f6llum til ge\u00f0s telur sig sj\u00e1lfan oft hj\u00e1lpsaman og g\u00f3\u00f0an, s\u00e1 sem h\u00e6ttir \u00f6llu s\u00ednu til a\u00f0 hj\u00e1lpa f\u00f3lki sem \u00fearf \u00e1 \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 halda.<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00deegar vi\u00f0 hugsum um m\u00f3\u00f0urhlutverki\u00f0 er allavega \u00e1 hreinu a\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 er streituvaldandi. \u00dea\u00f0 er vissulega svo, m\u00e6\u00f0ur eru oft \u00fatkeyr\u00f0ar af stressi, a\u00f0 reyna a\u00f0 halda heimili, passa upp \u00e1 a\u00f0 b\u00f6rnin s\u00e9u \u00f6rugg og hafi allt sem \u00feau \u00feurfi og svo framvegis.<\/p>\n

Au\u00f0vita\u00f0 er \u00fea\u00f0 afskaplega mikil \u00e1byrg\u00f0 og mamman kann a\u00f0 reyna a\u00f0 hugsa um sig sj\u00e1lfa og koma \u00ed veg fyrir foreldrakulnun sem gerist hj\u00e1 m\u00f6rgum m\u00f6mmum einhvernt\u00edma \u00e1 \u201eferlinum.\u201c Eitt af \u00fev\u00ed sem virkilega eykur streitu er a\u00f0 vera \u00ed \u00fev\u00ed hlutverki a\u00f0 \u00fe\u00f3knast \u00f6\u00f0rum.<\/p>\n

\u00der\u00e1tt fyrir a\u00f0 a\u00f0 l\u00fdsingin h\u00e9r a\u00f0 ofan: S\u00e1 sem vill gera \u00f6llum til ge\u00f0s telur sig sj\u00e1lfan oft hj\u00e1lpsaman og g\u00f3\u00f0an, s\u00e1 sem h\u00e6ttir \u00f6llu s\u00ednu til a\u00f0 hj\u00e1lpa f\u00f3lki sem \u00fearf \u00e1 \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 halda, kunni a\u00f0 vir\u00f0ast j\u00e1kv\u00e6\u00f0<\/em>, getur h\u00fan einnig veri\u00f0 ska\u00f0leg og auki\u00f0 streitu \u00ed l\u00edfi f\u00f3lks frekar en anna\u00f0. \u00c1 \u00feetta vi\u00f0 um \u00feig? Ef svo, hvernig er h\u00e6gt a\u00f0 st\u00f6\u00f0va \u00feessa heg\u00f0un til a\u00f0 f\u00e1 meiri r\u00f3 \u00ed l\u00edfi\u00f0?
\nEr mamma me\u00f0virk \u00f6\u00f0rum?<\/p>\n

\u00dea\u00f0 er f\u00edn l\u00edna milli \u00feess sem mamma er hj\u00e1lpleg og vinsamleg og \u00feess a\u00f0 vera a\u00f0 \u00fe\u00f3knast \u00f6\u00f0rum, lifa \u00ed me\u00f0virkni. \u00dea\u00f0 er mikilv\u00e6gt a\u00f0 bera kennsl \u00e1 hvort me\u00f0virknin s\u00e9 \u00ed raun a\u00f0 ey\u00f0ileggja meira en \u00e6skilegt er.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Samkv\u00e6mt\u00a0Healthline<\/a> er nau\u00f0synlegt a\u00f0 kafa d\u00e1l\u00edti\u00f0 inn \u00e1 vi\u00f0 til a\u00f0 leita svara, hei\u00f0arlegra svara, en \u00feetta er mikilv\u00e6gt. Ef mamman \u00e1ttar sig \u00e1 a\u00f0 h\u00fan \u00fer\u00e1ir a\u00f0 \u00f6\u00f0rum l\u00edki vi\u00f0 hana og h\u00fan \u00f3ttast jafnvel h\u00f6fnun, g\u00e6ti h\u00fan veri\u00f0 \u00ed \u00fev\u00ed hlutverki a\u00f0 \u00fe\u00f3knast \u00f6\u00f0rum. H\u00fan g\u00e6ti vilja\u00f0 passa inn \u00ed m\u00f6mmuh\u00f3pinn e\u00f0a \u00ed f\u00e9lagsskap \u00ed sk\u00f3la e\u00f0a leiksk\u00f3la og bo\u00f0i\u00f0 sig fram \u00ed \u00fdmis hlutverk og sj\u00e1lfbo\u00f0avinnu, \u00fer\u00e1tt fyrir a\u00f0 h\u00fan kannski hafi ekki t\u00edma vegna anna og skyldna. H\u00fan bara b\u00e6tir \u00feessum st\u00f6rfum \u00ed bunkann.<\/p>\n

Ef mamma \u00e1 erfitt me\u00f0 a\u00f0 segja \u201enei\u201c vi\u00f0 einhvern e\u00f0a vi\u00f0 einhverju, er h\u00fan l\u00edklega me\u00f0virk. A\u00f0 segja nei er vissulega erfitt, en mj\u00f6g nau\u00f0synlegt til a\u00f0 setja \u00f6\u00f0rum m\u00f6rk, \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0rir lesa ekki hugsanir og geta ekki vita\u00f0 hva\u00f0a m\u00f6rk \u00feessi mamma hefur. Ef h\u00fan er spur\u00f0 a\u00f0 einhverju og h\u00fan vill ekki gera \u00fea\u00f0, segir h\u00fan samt j\u00e1, \u00fev\u00ed h\u00fan er hr\u00e6dd um a\u00f0 henni ver\u00f0i hafna\u00f0.<\/p>\n

Mamma sem \u00fe\u00f3knast \u00f6\u00f0rum er flj\u00f3t a\u00f0 sam\u00feykkja allt sem hinir segja, jafnvel \u00fe\u00f3 h\u00fan s\u00e9 ekki samm\u00e1la, til \u00feess eins a\u00f0 \u201epassa inn\u201c og vera viss um a\u00f0 henni ver\u00f0i ekki \u00fath\u00fdst \u00far h\u00f3pnum. H\u00fan mun oft afsaka sig \u00fe\u00f3 h\u00fan hafi ekki gert neitt rangt, \u00fev\u00ed h\u00fan vill umfram allt halda fri\u00f0inn.<\/p>\n

Ska\u00f0legar a\u00f0st\u00e6\u00f0ur<\/strong><\/p>\n

N\u00fa, hafi\u00f0 \u00fei\u00f0 lesi\u00f0 \u00feetta a\u00f0 ofan, er au\u00f0velt a\u00f0 sj\u00e1 hversu ska\u00f0legt \u00feetta getur veri\u00f0 fyrir m\u00f3\u00f0ur. A\u00f0alm\u00e1li\u00f0 var\u00f0andi me\u00f0virkni og \u00feessa \u00fer\u00e1 a\u00f0 \u00fe\u00f3knast \u00f6\u00f0rum er a\u00f0 engin sk\u00fdr m\u00f6rk eru sett og \u00feetta getur gersamlega yfirbuga\u00f0 m\u00f6mmuna. H\u00fan g\u00e6ti teki\u00f0 a\u00f0 s\u00e9r meira en h\u00fan getur h\u00f6ndla\u00f0 og h\u00fan g\u00e6ti hreinlega enda\u00f0 \u00ed kulnun og ofur-streitu. \u00deetta \u00fe\u00fd\u00f0ir a\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 \u00feurfa a\u00f0 vera sk\u00fdr skref \u00ed \u00e1tt a\u00f0 st\u00f6\u00f0va \u00feessa heg\u00f0un.<\/p>\n

Hvernig \u00e1 a\u00f0 h\u00e6tta<\/strong><\/p>\n

Samkv\u00e6mt\u00a0Psychology Today<\/a>er afar nau\u00f0synlegt a\u00f0 l\u00edta inn \u00e1 vi\u00f0 til a\u00f0 st\u00f6\u00f0va me\u00f0virku heg\u00f0unina. \u00deegar \u00fe\u00fa ert be\u00f0in um a\u00f0 gera eitthva\u00f0, taktu sm\u00e1 stund til a\u00f0 spyrja sj\u00e1lfa \u00feig: \u201eAf hverju er \u00e9g a\u00f0 hj\u00e1lpa?\u201c Ef \u00fe\u00fa ert a\u00f0 hj\u00e1lpa \u00fev\u00ed \u00feig langar til \u00feess og \u00fea\u00f0 gle\u00f0ur \u00feig, fr\u00e1b\u00e6rt. Ef \u00fe\u00fa ert a\u00f0 hj\u00e1lpa til a\u00f0 koma \u00ed veg fyrir samviskubit ef \u00fe\u00fa gerir \u00fea\u00f0 ekki, er \u00fea\u00f0 merki um a\u00f0 \u00feetta s\u00e9 ekki heilbrigt.<\/p>\n